Is Alisa Kasmer, the woman who posted a long message on Facebook attacking Stephen Miller, really Miller's cousin? Yes, that's true: Kasmer's post claimed that she babysat Miller and he is her first cousin. Lead Stories researched the White House Deputy Chief of Staff's family tree and confirmed that Kasmer, 43, is the daughter of Miller's paternal aunt. Photographs included in the post of Kasmer with Miller also match other photographs of Kasmer found in our search.
The claim originated in a post (archived here) published on Alisa Kasmer's Facebook account on July 17, 2025. It opened:
A preface: I have debated about sharing this. A week ago, after the ICE raids in Camarillo, I had the worst panic attack I've experienced in over 30 years. (Shoutout to Zoloft for holding it together. F off, RFK, Jr.) Hours of sobbing, shaking, nausea, and complete loss of control into the early morning hours, led me to do the only thing that ever brings some clarity: write. The next day I started to write, while still reeling from the emotional hangover. A few days later, I was struck with another panic attack, this time as I was driving (thankfully close enough to home to make it back in one piece.) This sent me back into a spiral of heartbreak. I picked up where I had left off, and kept writing.
This is what the post looked like on Facebook at the time of writing:
(Source: Facebook screenshot taken on Mon Oct 6 18:21:21 2025 UTC)
The post received widespread attention months after it was first posted, amid Miller's involvement in White House decisions to send military troops into American cities in September and October of 2025.
This fact check is intended only to verify Kasmer's claim that she is Miller's cousin, not to fact check each point in her post.
The post continued:
Many of you know who my cousin is. Being public about it is something I've struggled with. I live with real fear about what posting something this raw might bring. I am living with the deep pain of watching someone I once loved become the face of evil. But I know that staying silent only deepens the ache. There's so much more I could say, and maybe someday I will. It's a long read. I'm wordy AF.
Several paragraphs later, Kasmer wrote about her grief that Miller, who she said was "lovable and harmless" as a child, had chosen "a path so filled with cruelty that I cannot, and will not, be a part of it":
Then there's the grief I carry inside my own family- the most personal and painful. I grieve a cousin I once loved. A boy I watched grow up, babysat, and shared a childhood with. The kid I made fun of for his obsession with Michael Jackson and Ghostbusters. The awkward, funny, needy middle child who loved to chase attention, yet was always the sweetest with the littlest family members. A kid that reminded me of Alex P. Keaton, young, conservative, maybe misguided, but lovable and harmless. Or so I thought. But I was so deeply wrong. And the realization that I didn't know you at all? It guts me. I grieve what you've become, Stephen. And I grieve what I've lost because of it. I grieve your children I will never meet. I grieve the future family you've stolen from me by choosing a path so filled with cruelty that I cannot, and will not, be a part of it. I will never knowingly let evil into my life, no matter whose blood it carries--including my own.
Lead Stories used the tools of Ancestry.com to construct Miller's family tree for several generations. We were helped with the discovery of this tree that was already on the ancestry website:
(Image source: Lead Stories screenshot of ancestry.com)
An Ancestry.com account is needed to see this tree online here.
This tree, which Lead Stories confirmed through multiple records is accurate, ends with a "Private Living" box, married to Katie Rose Waldman. Miller is currently married to Waldman, who previously served as the director of communications for Vice President Pence. It also correctly lists Miller's father as Michael D. Miller and his mother as Miriam S. Glosser. Suzanne Miller, who is Miller's aunt on his father's side, is shown as married to Jesse Kasmer. Suzanne and Michael Miller's mother is listed as Freya Baker Miller.
A search of the Los Angeles Times archives and Legacy.com found an obituary (archived here) for Freya Baker Miller, who died in 2015 at the age of 98. The article confirmed that she gave birth to Suzanne Miller (Alisa Kasmer's mother) in 1944 and to Michael Miller (Stephen Miller's father) in 1950. At the end, it includes both Alisa and Stephen as surviving grandchildren:
She is survived by her three children, her grandchildren, Janell and Alisa, Alexis, Stephen and Jacob, and her three great grandchildren, Jordyn, Taylor and Wyatt.
(Image source: Lead Stories screenshot of LATimes.com)
Lead Stories also used these photos for visual confirmation.
This is a photograph of Alisa Kasmer as a freshman in her high school yearbook via Ancestry.com:
(Image source: Lead Stories screenshot of ancestry.com)
Compare this image to one of several Kasmer included in her Facebook post:
(Image source: Lead Stories screenshot of Facebook.com)
Lead Stories called and left a voice message for Alisa Kasmer, but had not received a reply at the time of writing. We will update this article if she responds.
